Wildomar Magazine Celebrates The Third Anniversary of…

June 21, 2011

…. BRIDGETTE MOORE’S JUVENILE DESIRE FOR M&M CANDIES

Finally, after three years, sanity and reason has come to the City of Wildomar over the way it celebrates its third anniversary of it’s incorporation on July 01, 2008.

On Wednesday evening, June 22, 2011, at 6:00 PM, a hopefully modest and minimalist sheet cake will be unveiled prior to the regular City Council meeting.

Please click on the city agenda for confirmation:

http://www.cityofwildomar.org/uploads/files/minutes/06-22-11-ca.pdf

In honor of the reign of modesty, however temporary, Zak has dug into his archives in order to re-publish one of his earliest pieces, for your historical reading enjoyment, as follows:

April 18th, 2008 by zakt 

I REALLY WANTED MONOGRAMMED M & Ms

……Wildomar City Councilperson-elect Bridgette Moore, April 16, 2008.

It was a tender moment in a long, long city council meeting, with the pouty lower lip on Moore’s face jutting slightly, the silly expression of an adolescent desire for candy imprinted with Wildomar’s name, which touched a raw nerve in Zak when it came to the forced spending of his tax dollars.

It’s a perfect idea for a fun family birthday party for one’s teenage daughter.  It reflects, however,  a  casual, if not disrespectful, attitude by public officials toward our hard-earned tax dollars.

As one of the two members of the Ad Hoc Inauguration Committee which is responsible for planning the festivities for the July 1, 2008 celebration of the city’s “birth” day, Ms. Moore truly wanted to be able to include “monogrammed M & Ms” as a part of the party fare. These, to go along with food for a thousand people, a full-length movie and finally, fireworks.

Moore’s night, as described above, is going to cost multiple thousands of dollars.  Her further suggestion to get the money for the celebration from “sponsors” is not a good signal to developers and businesses that Wildomar already has a hand out for money. (I’m sure that “Greg Morrison, Temecula Resident” and his group of “taxpayers for responsible government” would be good for a hefty sum but the quid pro quo would be unsavory.)

Several lessons in  reality arise here for the city council-elect:

1)  Wildomar does not have one extra cent to waste and the City Council-elect should show their respect for our money from Day One. Excess at the celebration is the wrong message for the community. The Council needs to reflect their seriousness in minding each penny that comes Wildomar’s way to be able to survive beyond Birthday One in 2009, when the County-loaned money stops flowing.  

2)  Despite the majority “vote,” cityhood resulted from the votes of a dedicated minority of citizens amongst the total population.  This council needs to mind it’s manners as it is still an un-invited guest in a lot of Wildomar’s residences. 

4) Wildomar is being birthed during hard economic times. City Council needs to reflect that reality in its’ conduct.

Zak is willing to go along with a minimilist celebration but makes the following suggestions:

1)  Lose the movie;  it distracts from the serious object of the evening to swear in the city council and conduct the initial meeting.  Decorum is not a bad theme for Wildomar’s first day.

2) Lose the fireworks;  it increases the city’s risk of a fire loss in it’s first day of existence.  Fireworks are quite expensive (in the multiplied thousands) and there will be plenty of local fireworks shows in the next few days to sate the neediest pyromaniac.

3)  Lose the food; half of the area’s homeless will make their way to the high school for the free vittles from Wildomar.  Zak is more than capable of grabbing a burger for himself earlier in the evening. Zak is a functioning grown up.

4)  Let them eat cake; putting Marie Antoinette’s famous line into a new and positive context, providing large,  less expensive sheets of cake, embossed with Wildomar’s first day message, can be cut into varying sizes of cake to accomodate whomever shows up and saves the embarrassment of over or under-estimating how many will show.

Comments can be made to zakturango@excite.com and Zak only wishes, given the stern tenor of this piece, that he had an e-mail address at zakt@decorum.com instead.

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(Editor’s note, June 21, 2011: The more things change, the more things stay the same.)

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Wildomar Magazine….The Lost Pages….

April 22, 2011

 

…ZAK TURANGO’S FLIGHT OF FANTASY

One of the reasons for Zak Turango to return to the blogosphere for his personal enjoyment, was a critique from his son, Tim, an accomplished Hollywood screenwriter, that Zak’s writing skills were unsuited to the screenwriting genre, and with all due respect, and a loving admonition from a loving son, my talents were best suited for blogging and writing prose.

Desperate for copy, what with the startup of Wildomar Magazine, I reprinted a piece of fiction originally printed in Elsinore Magazine that I have always thought humorous. The following reprinted piece combines all of the elements that I like, military history, weapons, subterfuge and prose.

Adding to my mirth, is the confusion that I, as Zak Turango caused Sheryl, who originally thought the author was permanently and  physically damaged.

As recently as yesterday, Zak received an e-mail from a person I’ve already met, but who does not understand that Zak and Gil are one and the same. The e-mail complimented “our” writing style and hoped to meet one of us someday, primarily Zak.

Enough already, please join Zak and I for a brief journey to the past.

Em One Thumb, sort of

February 17th, 2008 by zakt

 

Not long after graduating from Lake Elsinore High School in 1952, I answered the patriotic call of our nation, as did thousands of other young American males, and joined the United States Army. It was with the purest of motives that I envisioned my service in the American army as being heroic and gallant. If I had to forfeit my life in the defense of my country, then so be it. It was the least that I could do to defeat godless Communism.

But the Fates dealt otherwise. Never one to question one’s destiny, I have rarely looked back at my unfortunate accident nor have I ever divulged the exquisite injury…. until now. The why of exposing one’s most profound and life-altering secrets cannot not be fathomed. Perhaps I have become bored with my own prose. It is enough that I bare the truth.

The most significant part of training for battle in the modern world is the necessity of becoming proficient in the use of war’s machinery. Not the airplanes and the tanks or the ships. No, the most important tool of the foot soldier is the basic infantry weapon, the rifle. The Army had replaced its’ proven shoulder weapon, the 1903 Springfield, a bolt-action thirty caliber rifle, with the M1 Garand during the early days of World War II.

 A bolt action rifle fires a single shot and requires the shooter to open the action after each shot, which ejects the spent cartridge and inserts another. The new weapon used the gases generated by the firing of the bullet to automatically push a bolt backwards, ejecting the spent shell and inserting another cartridge. This could happen a total of eight times before the rifle required reloading. When the rifle was emptied, the bolt remained open until further cartridges were inserted.

There was, however, one serious flaw in the weapon. Once a soldier had pushed a magazine of eight fresh cartridges energetically down in the maw of the rifle, he was required to quickly remove his right thumb before the action closed or he would suffer a painful slamming of said thumb in the metal action. The result was quite visible in its’ deformation of bony tissue and would subject the wounded to much manly derision amongst fellow soldiers.

Late one evening, long after the lights had been turned off, a young soldier, feeling the need to improve his dexterity in the process, without the ruthless scrutiny of men of war, reached for his unloaded M1 Garand, a fresh magazine of eight cartridges and practiced by the light of the moon coming through the barracks window. Tragically, the soldier had chosen to sit naked on his bunk and lay the M1 Garand carelessly across his lap. While reaching for the cartridges, he heard the familiar snap as the action closed crisply, without warning.

The pain was appalling in its’ intensity. Dental surgery sans anesthesia could never attain the acute level of severe and painful impulse that propelled up his nervous system, groin to brain, save for the briefest of pauses that serious injury allows the victim. The young soldier instantly felt as one with his comrades already in the foxholes on Pork Chop Hill. Surely somewhere, some soldier was, at that precise moment, experiencing the shocking impact of an enemy slug. His pain could not be any greater, were he to survive. Young Zak, at that precise moment, envied the dead.

In the years that followed, even the professorship at the Ivy League junior college and the many successful books on Fate/Destiny only partially masked the emotional scars that lurked just beneath the surface of an otherwise happy life. Marriage, understandably, had always been out of the question. Unable to bear up under the burden of the private disfigurement, I have recently taken advantage of a generous government’s offer to its’ veterans and have submitted to reconstructive surgery.

Re-aligning delicate but altered tissue takes time for healing and the threat of infection is one’s constant companion. As a result, I have had to allow my insights into politics to take second place to recovery. However, with the removal of stitching, I am again ready to offer my thoughts, for your consideration and reflection. 

Posted in When Zak’s Been Drinking…. | No Comments

Comments can be made to zakturango@excite.com.


Wildomar Magazine…The Lost Pages….

April 19, 2011

….. CONTINUES

As Zak started to write about Wildomar, there was little news of significant import to write about. Therefore, of necessity, some of the earliest articles were fictional.

Naturally, some of my detractors would state that most of my articles in Wildomar Magazine have been fictional, forgetting that fact is often far stranger than fiction.

In any event the saga continues apace.

The Lost City of Wildomar

February 12th, 2008 by zakt

 

 THE LOST CITY OF WILDOMAR DISCOVERED

Once the center of a vast Aztec civilization of Aztlan, what is now called Wildomar is actually the Lost City of Pochtecatl. Pochtecatl means “merchant” in the Nuahatl language. 

Legend has it that Pochtecatl would return to its former glory four years before the end of the world, now scheduled for 2012, according to the Aztekian calendar. 

Pochtecatl was destroyed by hordes of merchants, lured by the scent of desperation. Overly-optomistic priests tried to build their temple during an Aztec recession.  When they needed money, they began to encourage all empty land to be built out for commerce.

Finally, they began to auction even the bricks of the temple to pay for a continued existance. Eventually, every brick of the city’s temple was sold to pay the bills of the city. 

The ancient prophecies again foretell the failure of the Lost City by the year 2011, just before the end of the entire world in 2012, as a result of miscalculation and poor financial planning by the Lost City’s High Priests and Priestesses and the failure to lure Walmart to the northeast corner of Bundy Canyon and Interstate 15.  

Ironically, had the Walmart deal gone through, the Lost City of Wildomar would have disappeared by the year 2010. 

Posted in When Zak’s Been Drinking…. | No Comments »

As always, comments can be made to zakturango@excite.com.


Wildomar Magazine….The Lost Pages….

April 18, 2011

… FROM FEBRUARY 09, 2008

As a result of relentless digging, Zak has found  the  earliest pages of Wildomar Magazine, which were written on the www.hipblogger.com blogging platform. Unfortunately, approximately 6 months into the experience, for reasons unknown, the platform crashed, taking my screed with it into cyberspace

Until now.

Therefore, in order to flesh out this unique history of Wildomar from the days of the city’s pre-existence, I will republish those early articles for your curiosity, and hopefully, enjoyment.

 Wildomar Magazine Starts Now….

 

     

 WHY WAIT UNTIL JULY?  

February 9, 2008

There are going to be too many important things happening before the green flag drops on July 1, 2008 and Wildomar’s new citizens will learn to appreciate Zak Turango’s special commentary on those happenings for them to develop their own opinions.

WildomarMagazine clearly understands how our democratic system works. Simply, the majority rules. Sadly, the City of Wildomar will exist due only to the will of the majority of those who actually voted.  However, those who failed to vote must also be counted in the political calculation. 

Wildomar has approximately 20,000 persons within it’s new borders. Less than 5,000 of those persons voted. The vote tally for “Yes” on cityhood was just over 2,900; the vote tally for ”No” on cityhood was just under 1,900, a difference of about 1,000.  If half of those 1,000+ voters out of all of the 20,000 persons in the city had voted no instead of yes, Measure C would have failed and we would not be having this new conversation. Alas, if my aunt had a moustache, she’d be my uncle.

There was no overwhelming mandate for Wildomar cityhood. Yet there was no way to stop it. It is nearly an impossibility to raise sufficient political opposition to stop such a movement.  Wildomar is a city due to the hard work of a passionate minority group of cityhood activists. Congratulations to them for achieving what they desired. Nevertheless, their minority desires will now attempt to impose a significant reshaping of the currently comfortable surroundings on the nearly 17,000 citizens who never voted for cityhood.

Mistakes have already been made. For example, the Yes group could/should have included instructions to their minions to vote “at large” on Measure D. Instead, “vote by districts” passed, ironically, by an even smaller minority of voters than did Measure C. The impact of Measure D apparently did not occur to the inexperienced activists and, as a result, “their” city council will be set up in districts at it’s formation. 

WildomarMagazine must rise from it’s slumber then, serving up it’s unique brand of informational fodder for any who care. Forget about those calling for a honeymoon of sweetness and compassion on the novice leaders.  There is no honeymoon without a wedding.  I didn’t say “I do.”

In the meantime, if anyone has any complaints about the startup of WildomarMagazine, take your gripes to those ”Yes” voters who have stirred me from my comfort.

You may contact zakturango@excite.com with your comments.

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There you have it folks. The very first posting of Wildomar Magazine in history. Three years, 447 articles and more than 56,000 views later, we complete the circle. More to follow…..