I was present at last week’s City Council meeting to observe the “passing of the gavel” ceremony between former Mayor Ben Benoit and newly-appointed Mayor Tim “Mad Dog” Walker, who immediately turned the usually august moment into a comedy routine.
One of the key points mentioned during the ceremony was that Walker is the sixth Mayor of Wildomar to hold that ceremonial position.
Therefore, I thought it would be a good time to do a re-capitulation of Wildomar’s sad legacy of sub-standard mayors, in the order of their “ascendancy” to the middle seat at the council dais, as follows:
1) Mayor Bob Cashman, Wildomar’s First Mayor is an excessively mild-mannered, genuinely intelligent and formally educated individual, whose tepid mannerisms have only earned him the utter, and dismissive, disdain of his uneducated City Council colleagues.
2) Mayor Scott Farnam, Wildomar’s Rhinestone Cowboy Mayor, whose predilection for physical violence led to reports of parking lot brawls and personal skirmishes at the former Bikini Beach Club bar in Lake Elsinore, which eventually “culminated,” in my opinion, in a dastardly personal physical assault on yours truly on December 08, 2009, which resulted in a formal police report and investigation. In addition, his reputation, according to my sources, among Lake Elsinore locals, as the “drunken Mayor of Wildomar” was the result of evenings of liquid consumption at Pepe’s Restaurant and Bar in Canyon Lake.
3) Mayor Bridgette Moore, Wildomar’s adolescent teenage princess, who reportedly often joined Farnam at Pepe’s, likely achieved her best moment as Mayor, when she appointed a barnyard goat-like animal to be the Mayor for the Day (ironically, perhaps our best-qualified Mayor, although, admittedly, I don’t have evidence of any of our mayors (including the goat) soiling City Hall’s carpets with fecal pellets) during her tenure.
Bridgette is also directly responsible for leading Wildomar into the ill-conceived and exorbitant participation with the Animal friends of the Valleys, operated by the Southwest Communities Finance Authority.
4) Mayor Marsha Swanson, whose “success” in the parasitic world of real estate sales (why should anyone take a 6% commission of the value, based on a sale price of your house that you have cared and paid for?) does not equate to success in the “real” business world, appears to be the equally fatuous, older, big sister to the adolescent teenage princess, Mayor Bridgette Moore.
5) Mayor Ben Benoit just completed a remarkably unremarkable year as Mayor, save for the personal, political resume enhancements and appointments facilitated by his family name, rather than by his personal accomplishments.
6) Mayor Tim Walker, the wisecracking (when not manifesting anger) City Councilman has merely shifted his amateurish comedy act to the chair to his right and will inadvertently achieve his quest to become known as the Buffoon Mayor of Wildomar.
The aforementioned litany of underachieving, dysfunctional ceremonial Mayors is the primary reason why I voted against incorporation in 2008.
I was always afraid that this was going to happen.
I just didn’t know how bad it could be.
Comments can be made to firstname.lastname@example.org.
If these characters don’t take city governance seriously, why should we?