Too Gullible To Identify….

 

….SO WILDOMAR MAGAZINE IS FREE TO MOCK

Today’s Californian reports on churches duped by their own ignorance but did not identify the Murrieta congregation and leadership, apparently to protect said leadership from ridicule and criticism. 

“State Attorney General Jerry Brown said as many as 30 Southern California churches —- three in Riverside County —- may have been defrauded, with the same companies suspected of bilking other churches in as many as 10 other states.

The local churches involved were in Murrieta, Perris and Moreno Valley.

The companies offered churches free computer kiosks that could serve as electronic message boards and generate advertising revenue, Brown said.

Instead, churches were left with leases as high as $45,000 per year for what amounted to little more than desktop computers and printers housed in podium-sized wooden boxes,” the attorney general’s office said in a statement.”

Since churches are tax-free, non-profit organizations, the general public is forced to subsidize their existence.  Generally speaking, the benefits provided by churches outweighs the costs to the community.  However, when church leaders forget that their church sanctuary is just that; a place of safety from the excesses of our world and put an advertising medium within that place of “safety,” leaders too greedy/naive to protect their flock should bear having to read of their greed/naivete in a public forum.

It is a matter of time before someone will publish the identity of this Murrieta church and we will then know who the advertising genius is. Rest assured, yea, rest in  Blessed Assurance, that Wildomar Magazine will update you.

Comments can be made below.  Wildomar Magazine denies placing any advertising on the Murrieta kiosk.  Zak has too much respect for God’s little sheep to try take any advantage, unlike their supposed shepherd.

Zak, The World’s Best Boyfriend Blogger…

….AS MAYOR WHINES ABOUT SOMEONE ELSE’S PERSONAL LIFE

In a sad moment for Wildomar politics, Mayor Scott Farnam publicly complained (during the norming session) about Wildomar Magazine’s Zak Turango’s impact on his political tenure as mayor, referencing a “boyfriend blogger.” Somehow, he deems WM’s parody and satire, a rich American political tradition,  as unfair.

Farnam needs to remember that the real power in this community is held in the hands of elected officials and a three minute speech during public comments at a city council meeting is a pale comparison to the effect of a mayor’s comments to a newspaper reporter.

Thus, Wildomar Magazine attempts to level the playing field (without moving 700,000 cu. yards of earth), but it is effective only if it entertains. 

Indulge me while I insert a readers recent comment to Wildomar Magazine, as follows:

“I assume my congrats go to Zak Turango? Excellent material, very informative and great presentation. I shall attend future city meetings. The five aligned as I presumed from the election rhetoric. I live directly across from Cornerstone, which honestly looks like a large prison complex every night with huge flood lights everywhere. Destroyed my entire 21-yr-old view to the east.”

Mayor Scott, you would be wise to recognize, and represent, the interests of this Wildomar resident as well. Instead, you will likely continue to pander to the desperately hoped for votes to be found in Cornerstone’s pews and soccer fields.

Was it only a year ago when First Mayor Bob “Wedgie” Cashman was writhing under the spotlight of WM? Bob has since turned out to be a pretty good councilman, but way too thin-skinned to be  mayor.  Now it appears that Farnam is suffering from the same condition.

Get over it, Scott.  You’re beginning to remind Zak of Lake Elsinore’s worst mayor ever, Pam Brinley.  Brinley, after suffering the well-deserved stings of Elsinore Magazine, refused to run for re-election (she would have been re-elected) but she could not handle EM’s commentary and humorous graphics.

Your own blogging provides much fodder for Wildomar Magazine.  “Adult” dinners in Tijuana (one can only imagine) touted from Facebook. Or, for your consideration, the following:

Scott Farnam.. is worth $1719 on Own Your Friends!

Buy Scott Farnam.. for $1924!

The above ad is taken from MySpace. 

 

Res ipsa loquator. That’s Latin for” the thing speaks for itself.”

I wouldn’t recommend paying that much, however.

Zak doesn’t need to resort to fiction.  Mayor Farnam provides plenty  of material for an online satire magazine. 

Just like  Brinley.

Wildomar Thanks Cornerstone For All of The….

….BENEFITS AND BLESSINGS THEY PROVIDE

Now and in the future.

After reading of the “necessary” removal of  up to 700,000 cubic yards of natural mountain for their Wildomar parking lot project, Wildomar Magazine rejects the City planning staff conclusion of “no significant impacts” as a result of Cornerstone’s huge mining operation in order to create more parking spaces. If moving 700,000 cu. yds. of dirt over Wildomar’s roads isn’t significant, then what, pray tell, would staff consider significant?

Will  this be the future view of Monte Vista after 116 daily dump truck loads, times 5 days per week, times 4  weeks per month, times 25 months? (Zak will generously do the math for the new real estate agents just out of licensing school: it works out to up to 58,000 truck trips. Brokers have their own “business” calculators to use. It’s the one with the 6% button worn smooth).

WM believes that Cornerstone should be made to fund an Environmental Impact Report (“EIR”) in order for the Wildomar City Council to honestly consider this project in light of Menifee’s appeal as well as well as that of nearby residents.

WM predicts that any positive public sentiment and all fuzzy feelings about Cornerstone and their promoters will be gone after this project is finished.

With The District Issue Resolved….

NEXT UP……CHOOSING A NEW MAYOR

It’s amazing that Scott Farnam’s term as mayor of Wildomar is nearly over. And now comes a dicey problem.  Who will replace him? As a public service, and, as usual, at no charge to the public, Zak Turango will lay out the choices for your contemplation only, since only the five sitting council members get to vote for mayor.  We are all mere  non-voting observers.

First and most obvious, is Mayor Pro Tempore Bridgette Moore,  pronounced “pro tem,” a latin phrase meaning “for the time being.” She was the second highest vote-getter to Wildomar’s First Mayor Bob Cashman’s highest vote count. However, this time last year, Council member Marsha Swanson made a surprise motion, nominating Farnam for Mayor. A quick second and a 4-1 vote made Farnam the Mayor. (Cashman nominated and voted for himself, which was unsuccessful). 

Nevertheless, in a world where substantive qualifications may not matter,  Moore publically admitted that  land use issues were not her “forte” (French for “strong point”),  a world where her soulish connection to the single most powerful political entity in Wildomar, Cornerstone Community Church,  does not give  residents sufficient pause,  Mayor Pro Tempore Moore appears to be in line to be the next mayor.  Just because it ’s her turn.

Second, neither Cashman and Farnam, having already served, would dare be so boorish as to fantasize another term while others have yet to serve as mayor.

Third, Council member Marsha Swanson has yet to ascend to the center of the dais. Despite her real estate background and support for most developer issues brought before the council, such as a recent “aye” vote to move forward on reducing Developer Impact Fees (“DIF”) by half, if she so desires, it is likely that she would have a second and two votes (besides her own) to be the next mayor.

Fourth, Council member Sheryl Ade, although well qualified to lead, given her experience and knowledge of land use issues, and her lack of obligation to any influence group or private interest, will not be selected to be the Mayor. In fact, she was told that she has committed “political suicide” for trying to get the Cornerstone project before the entire council.  In contrast, go to Cornerstone’s website and download the 10-11-09 sermon by the Reverend  Ron Armstrong, where he applauds Farnam, Moore and Swanson for “knowing the facts” when they refused to further discuss the project, forcing an appeal by Menifee and local residents. It seems to Wildomar Magazine that missing out on the “praise” from Cornerstone’s leadership may be a good thing.

Selection will take place in December and I wanted to get WM readers prepared in thought for what is about to take place. If only for the amusement value in the process and outcome.

Comments will be permitted, below.

Those That Can, Do….

 

….THOSE THAT CAN’T, TEACH…. 

…AND THOSE THAT CAN’T TEACH..SELL REAL ESTATE.

Zak’s usually sharp brain has finally kicked back to the “on” mode, after being  overcome with annoyance with a Menifee City Councilman abusing his guest privileges at last Wednesday’s Wildomar City Council meeting.

But the same issue attends.  The vote was 3-2 to give developers a 50% reduction in Developer Impact Fees (“DIF”) to stimulate the local job market. What Zak missed is the blatant “aye” votes on the issue by two realtors, whose occupations rely on “inventory” of homes to be bought and sold.  Councilwoman Swanson specifically spoke to the issue that Wildomar currently has so little inventory that Realtor/former Planning Commissioner Casillas had to buy a home in Lake Elsinore.

Realtor/Mayor Scott Farnam and Realtor/Councilwoman Marsha Swanson should have recused themselves from the vote due to an explicit conflict of interest. Now Zak, and other Wildomar residents, will have to absorb the “developer’s impacts” ourselves. 

Wildomar cannot afford to waive developer fees, period.

Comments can be made to former Realtor, Zak at zakturango@excite.com or by making a comment within.

Menifee Mommas, Don’t Let Your Babies….

…GROW UP TO BE ASSES.

Menifee city councilman, Scott Mann, representing the Western Riverside  Council of Governments (“WRCOG”), spoke to the Wildomar Council last evening in an attempt to get support for reducing developer fees by 50% to “bring jobs” to the area. Despite the courageous opposition of Councilman Bob Cashman and Council woman Sheryl Ade,  Mayor Farnam, Mayor Pro Tem Moore and Council woman Marsha Swanson voted “aye,” thereby pushing the matter forward in the process.

Councilman Mann then retook the public dais and mocked Cashman and Ade by gloating that Menifee, who has dropped their fees, will be happy to take the tax increment from Wildomar, an embarrassing breach of civic politeness.

What an ass.

They are cute, however, when they’re little.

Comments can be made to Zak at zakturango@excite.com

Oviedo Irreplacable….?

…WILDOMAR LUCKY TO HAVE FRANK AS CITY MANAGER?

According to the Elk Grove Citizen, dated September 2, 2009,”….cost will be offset by not rehiring a deputy city manager in the place of Frank Oviedo who left in August to be city manager of Wildomar in southern California.”

Wildomar Magazine hopes Frank is as good a manager for Wildomar as he apparently was in distant Elk Grove as a deputy manager. So much so that Elk Grove gave up looking for his replacement.

Back in the day when a smoker would approach Zak, seeking a light for an unfiltered Camel with an innocent question,” Got a match?” The instant answer was always, “Not since Superman died!”  That still cracks me up.

Ahhhh, gone are the days of such banal humor.  Now, one has to do this  stuff to be thought of as funny.

Got a match Elk Grove? Not since Frank left.

Anyway, have a powerful day, Frank.

Comments can be made to zakturango@excite.com.  Please leave the humor to we professionals.

Zak’s Weirdest……

…BRUSH WITH FAME

When the reports of scandal about evangelical leader and mega-church pastor, Ted Haggard, first made the news several years ago, the church world gasped at the offense and the anti-church crowd crowed with delight as this man had to resign in disgrace. 

Now, with new revelations (an ironic word for the bible student, no?) about his admitted exploitation of a sexually confused staff pastor, Haggard is now on a book promotion tour, including a recent appearance on the Larry King Show.  Haggard and his odd-thinking spouse, now want to “tell their story to everyone” as they deal with a “heterosexual with issues.”  (see Wikipedia for the quote).

Public disgrace of a religious leader is a sad day for any religious group, especially those groups that paint such a narrow path and forget what unmerited favor is all about.  Haggard’s flaws should not be touted in a book.  Haggard and his spouse should simply disappear from the public eye and deal with “their” issues in private.

Brush with fame, Zak?  Oh.  Permit me to get back on track. Back in the day, back to the time when Haggard was first exposed, his church in Colorado was taken over by an associate music pastor, the Reverend Ross Parsley, now in his mid-forties. 

When Ross was about four years old, he was the ring-bearer at my wedding.  I bought my first car, a 1954 Chevy, from his mother, Connie, for $100.

Comments can be made to Zak at zakturango@excite.com but only if Zak is “your”  weirdest brush with fame.

Lemme See Your Hands….

….IF YOU’RE STILL A VIRGIN

The victory by California Lutheran High School at the 4th Court of Appeals may be a hollow victory for the cause of Christianity and private Christian high schools everywhere.

Now that the sexual curiosity of two adolescent teenaged girls has been nailed to a cross, how will Wildomar’s most famous high school (this is national news already!) deal with adolescent sexual experimentation and curiosity if two heterosexual teens (must be a boy and a girl) are discovered to be exploring each other behind the football stadium stands?  Another expulsion, followed by litigation?

Can any adult respond with a straight face and tell Wildomar Magazine that their conduct as Christian adolescents was always consistent with their Christian moral teachings?  Can anyone convince Zak that the current student body attending California Lutheran High School has no other youth with unsure passions driven by their changing bodies and developing appetites?

Thus, the ongoing hypocrisy of a church culture attempting to legislate Christian morality continues to damage a small but important portion of another generation of youth.  There may be others in the high school, struggling with their sexual identity as many humans do, that will have to be much more careful of their personal conduct, lest they be caught for not being chaste.  

Zak does not disapprove of teenagers struggling with their moral values and standards.  It is better to have moral values and standards to struggle with, rather than unrestrained sensuality.  

But “adult” leaders would be much wiser and more Christ-like by being available to all of the teens in their schools and be ready to give answers to their personal questions, even if the answer is “I don’t know for sure but…..” At the very least, that would be more human and grace-filled.

However, enforcing moral standards through contentious litigation will not bring glory to the school or to Jesus.  Rather, the hypocritical posture “achieved” through this appellate decision is likely to be mocked by the very students attending classes now.  Is each of them a virgin?  If not, shouldn’t they be expelled for failing to live up to the school’s standards?

However, we cannot know the secrets of the students. (I’m sure that the students know “who” is into “what”). The school’s leadership must now be monitoring their student’s behaviors with great zeal, given this “win.”

Zak, of course, doesn’t want to know.  But Zak would want the students of California Lutheran High School to know that their moral “failings” are subject to God’s marvelous grace and His creatures are allowed to learn and grow from their personal “failings.”

Next week, Wildomar Magazine will be conducting a national survey of the male leadership of all evangelical churches, asking the following question:   ”Have you ever committed the Sin of Onan while leading your congregation?”  (Colorado pastors will be exempted for the time being).

Those who honestly answer “yes” will be forgiven for being human. 

Those who answer “no” are likely liars and hypocrites.

Lemme see your hands.

Comments may be made to Zak at zakturango@excite.com.    However, let he/she who is without sin save their comments for their hypocrisy support group “share time.”

Zak’s Early Brush With Fame….

….WAS THE FOUNDER OF TACO BELL, GLEN BELL.

Wildomar Magazine’s editor-in-chief Zak Turango’s life has been filled with odd “run-ins” with some famous people.  Sadly, none of the brushes have helped Zak in the least. 

For example, going through the U. S. Navy’s Survival School (“SERE”) in 1968, prepping for Vietnam duty at the same time as former presidential candidate and current Senator John Kerry helped “not a bit.” 

In fact, my political disapproval of then-Candidate Kerry is likely and greatly a result of Zak (pictured below, circa 1969) having almost nearly spent more time in a U. S. Navy hospital (Marble Mountain Navy Hospital, Danang) in Vietnam than U. S. Navy Swift Boat Captain Kerry spent in Vietnam.

Jeez but Zak digresses.  Get over it, Zak.

Back to the taco meister. Bell had built his first Taco Bell in Downey, followed  by several more in Long Beach.  See www.tacobell.com and click on “Our Company” and then “History” for the entire story.

Zak worked stealthily by cleaning up the fast food restaurant ( working “under the table,” due to being poor, under-aged and desperate for cash) and met Glen Bell when he came into the store on 10th and Alamitos in Long Beach early one morning. 

He eventually offered a permanent position at his headquarters to one of my older cousins, David, who turned him down, commenting later to Zak that he didn’t think “this guy would go far.” 

Sadly, David’s bad judgment took him to his next job packing valves in boxes of dusty, asbestos-laden filler material in a shipping department with another Long Beach company.  His death at 42 from mesothelioma (cancer from asbestos) put a sad exclamation point to his career choice.

Thus, in honor of Glen Bell, Taco Bell and cousin David, Zak is going to cook his own version of homemade tacos for this evening’s fare.  Zak’s recipe for tacos is classified but never doubt that corn tortillas, Stater Bros. hamburger (22% fat but Zak drains) and, ironically, Heinz Ketchup, also known as Norwegian Hot Sauce, will be involved.

The irony, for the uninformed, is that Senator John Kerry is married to the Heinz fortune.

Go figure.

Comments can be made to Zak at zakturango@excite.com.  Please, no recipes as my taco recipe is a family treasure and, therefore, afforded reverential status and no changes can be made.